Monday, November 29, 2010

USB Rechargeable 1.3MP Pin-hole Motion-Detection Spy AV Camera Clothes Hook



You sick farks, I can't believe you would even consider buying this Pin-hole Motion-Detection Spy AV Camera Clothes Hook. Oh, your teen daughter thought you were just being a considerate host when you installed this hook in the pool-house changing room. And your wife thinks you are just "too tired" for her since you have to stay up all night at your computer... For WORK, right? And those Kleenex are for your ALLERGIES, right? Why don't you just have a seat over there...

Of course, you could also stick one of these on the back of your office door, and find out who's been rummaging through your files while you are out.



If you see this in the fitting room of your local boutique... Call the cops.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Candle Powered Flying Sky Lantern 2 pack!


Imagine the joy you and your little ones will feel as you light the candle of the miniature hot-air balloon and watch it rise! Watch it clear the trees! Watch it land on your neighbors roof and set it alight! Watch the Judge enter a judgement against you! 

Yah, what a brilliant idea. Let's take some Fire, and set it aloft to fly in random directions. Write your name and address on it before you let it go, makes it so much easier on the pitchfork-wielding angry mob that will surely follow any launch of this wonderful product.

Better yet, write your closest personal friend's name and address on the side.

From the sellers own website:

2 x Fay Night Balloons Khoom Sky Lanterns UFO Wishing Lamps! (They look pretty butch to me, but whatevs)
Increase unbelievably funny for your special day

Pattern design, color and pattern assorted. Unlike the photo at the top, there will likely be some incomprehensible words or images written on the balloon.


For what should be obvious legal reasons, I recommend you do not buy nor use these instruments of fiery death. Flies best during cold weather.

Buy it here:

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Anti-Explosion Glasses!



Yes, Anti-Explosion Glasses. Not explosion proof, notice, but anti-explosion! Why merely protect yourself from an explosion when you can prevent the explosion entirely! Just think of how useful this could be... In-laws coming for dinner? Report cards or credit card bills expected in the mail? Just don these hi-tek Anti-Explosion Glasses to prevent what would otherwise be an inevitable conflagration! A must-have for husbands with a 'wandering eye" and wives with a Nordy's habit.



Comes with three pair of colored lenses, pouch, and a prescription eyeglass frame (although if you need prescription goggles, you are better off going through Zenni Optical for that.)